Well I just spent the last 2-3 hours on the phone with my mom and both of my brothers. And you can probably guess what we were talking about...babies! Of course most conversations start with stories about Lily and Anna and how funny and completely different they are! My oldest brother always asks me if I have any new "Lily stories"! HA! I live every day in Lily stories! HA!
Eventually we are on the phone for longer than we anticipated talking about the girls and of course the adoption and where everything currently is. And you know what I always think when I hang up? I could literally talk about this all day. Dream about where he is, when I will get to hold him for the first time or see his picture! Anything and everything can become all consuming!
And as thoughts, concerns and worries consume me I try to fall back on what I know is truth. I am confident that while I don't have all the details, God does. I am also confident that while I rest safely in God's arms so does my son, where ever he is. And while I don't always practice these truths in every moment, God is so good to me. Good to place family and friends around us who are so excited for us! Let me share with you some of the fun things people have said or told us that have kept me smiling and encouraged.
My two brothers fighting over what sports equipment to get him. Troy wants soccer and Tyler wants baseball.
Listening to my mom ask me why we can't bring home two sweet babies!!
Receiving texts from our friend Barbie that are filled with incredible amounts of encouragement.
Having my sister-in-law say that she and her husband are humbled to be named his guardians! (this one makes a mommy's heart burst with joy!)
Listening to Lily watch Lion King and say her brother lives there in Africa! And continue to ask me if he can play with her in the playroom when Mommy brings him home!
Share this journey with high school students and watch as they ask us about our son and share their own desire to adopt one day as we model this for them!
Fall in love with God more as He opens and softens hearts towards transracial adoption.
I could literally write pages of this! And as we continue along this journey we are so grateful. Grateful to have been chosen by God for this awesome assignment! Yes it is full of roller coaster moments, highs and lows but I wouldn't trade it for anything. At the beginning of this process I was frightened and questioned why God would have called us to something like this. I knew that my weak spirit could not handle the looks, the questions and the constant tension prevalent in transracial adoption. After voicing these concerns to a friend who has adopted two from Ethiopia she simply said, "Nikki, God does not always call us to the easy things!" and while some of this has been trying I can honestly say that I am so thankful He has called me to be uncomfortable. There is no reward in the easy! And the incredible blessings and life change I have seen in myself, my husband, family and friends are worth every moment of pain I may endure! So today I stand thankful that God has called me to the hard! Thankful that He has chosen to use me to show grace and love in the life of a child!
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